UNDERSTAND THE NAME : SELF-INTRODUCTION
Dear Professor Blackstone,
My name is Faizal and the purpose of me writing this letter is to formally introduce myself to you. I am currently a student taking a degree called Sustainable Infrastructure Engineering (Land) at the Singapore Institute of Technology (SIT). Previously, I was a mechanical engineering student in the nearby Singapore Polytechnic where my views on engineering were broadened.
With me coming from a family line where all the males were in the engineering sector, I was pressured to follow their footsteps. Thankfully, I found myself being able to fit inside the industry with the availability of this course. Ever since I was young, buses and MRTs have always piqued my interest. For example, I used to stand near to the rear of the MRT so that I could see the railway tracks as the train moves from station to station thus that explains why I decided to join the course.
One of my strengths in communication would be that I can interact with strangers easily. With experiences coming from working at Gardens By the Bay and also retail stores such as Charles & Keith, I was able to start conversations and also understand the customer/s needs despite their different ethnicity and language used. I believe being flexible and adaptive during communication is definitely a useful skill and has definitely benefited me throughout my work experiences.
However despite my strengths, one of my weaknesses that seemed to pull me down during my poly days is that whenever i had to present myself in a big group, i tend to have butterflies in my stomach causing me to sweat profusely and also stutter during presentations.
For me, the goal of this module is to learn how to be able to present to a big group confidently and hold conversations considering that it is one of the important communication skills that is required in a workplace. I believe with this skill , I would be able to understand my colleagues and bond with them better providing a better work environment.
Warmest Regards,
Faizal
The reflection given by Faizal is superb as he explains himself with clarity by making his objective clear which is to be a confident and effective speaker. He is specific by declaring what he wants and avoids filler words and sentences to potray it. The message flows logically and is correct and complete with a tactful tone. (7 Cs of Communication)
ReplyDeleteThe introduction also shows Dweck's mindset (2017) which is a growth mindset. Faizal embraces challenges and persists in obstacles as seen in his work experience and is inspired by others success. He also sees effort as necessary to overcome his shortcomings.
Hi Zahid,
DeleteThank you for taking time off your already busy schedule to comment on my blog post !
Faizal,
ReplyDeleteThis introduction letter is very well constructed. There is a flow when it comes to structure of the letter and the content is very well organised. I do, however, feel that perhaps you could have elaborated more on your weakness to provide the reader with a better understanding. With a better understanding, your readers might empathise with your situation even more. Other than that, this was a good read and I wish you all the best in achieving your goals for this module.
Hi Yusri,
DeleteThank you for the feedback. As per your feedback, I will work on elaborating my weaknesses so that the reader will understand my point-of-view even better. Appreciate it buddy !
Dear Faizal,
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing about yourself to allow your readers to learn more about you.
First of all, the pieces of information given are well structured. Hence, I can easily understand the intended message that you are trying to convey in each paragraph.
However, in paragraph 2, maybe you can explain more of the internal part about MRT and buses that pique your interest. For example, explain how the movement of the railway attracts your attention which leads you to stand near the rear.
As for the weakness, you can suggest a few improvements that you would like to experiment on to achieve your goals.
Nevertheless, this is a good introduction letter.
Regards,
Alice Lim
Hi Alice, thank you for taking the time to read my formal letter. I will work on the shortcomings as recommended and hopefully it will be a better introduction letter worth reading.
Delete
ReplyDeleteDear Faisal,
Thank you for sharing this story. It seems both personal and professional as you recount your background, communication challenges and how your comm skill levels have evolved over time thanks to your varied work experiences as an adult and insights you gained as a boy. Indeed you make the case when writing of your communication strength: that you are good on the interpersonal level, that you are 'flexible and adaptive.' You state as much, but to make this a stronger letter, I'd like to see a specific example.
What I would also like to hear more about is how being in a family of engineers you were expected to follow in the line. What 'pressure' gave you that impression when you were young?
In this letter, we also can see that you have clear goals for the module. I’d like to see a clearer articulation of those as the module moves forward in an online mode. Please don't hesitate to step up and share as much as possible.
There are some language issues:
1. sentence structure
-- For example, I used to stand near to the rear of the MRT so that I could see the railway tracks as the train moves from station to station thus that explains why I decided to join the course. > (comma splice + verb tense issues) ?
2. phrasing
-- I believe being flexible and adaptive during communication is definitely a useful skill and has definitely benefited me throughout my work experiences. > (repetition) ?
3. punctuation, verb use, word form + other issues
-- However despite my strengths, one of my weaknesses that seemed to pull me down during my poly days is that whenever i had to present myself in a big group, i tend to have butterflies in my stomach causing me to sweat profusely and also stutter during presentations. > (lack of verb tense consistency, etc.)
However, despite my strengths, I have weaknesses. One that seemed to pull me down during my poly days was that whenever I had to present myself in a big group, I tended to have butterflies in my stomach, causing me to sweat profusely and also to stutter during presentations.
I look forward to hearing more from you throughout the rest of the term.
Cheers,
Brad
Hi Prof Brad,
DeleteThank you for taking the time off your busy schedule to give me these constructive feedbacks. I will definitely work on it to make this letter of higher quality. Thank you once again!